I do not know why, everytime I felt sad or happy, I always want to hug someone. Later, I found out that hug can help to release the stress. Unfortunately, I am unable to perform hugging as many as I want it to. Why?

First of all, helloooo! I am 37 years old. Everytime I hug my dad, he probably just look at me in bewilderment as if he want to say like am I not too old for this?
Sometimes I want to hug my friends whenever I was happy or sad. But several of them just do not like being hug so I hold back in this hugging business.

Plus, Asian people is not very good in expressing their feeling. I hardly seen my friends hugging each other whenever there was good news or even bad news. They probably only give each other pat on the back or a quick hug. My mom is probably one of this kind of person. She hugged me a lot when I was still a kid. But, as soon as I entered the University she always rejected my hug. Sometimes, I feel so sad. She always said to me that I should not behave like a ten years old kid. But, the worst part when she said that if I like to hug so much then how come I did not try to find myself a good husband. I was taken aback at that time, si I withdrew myself from her and I hardly hug her anymore. Mostly right now, I hug my teddy bear and end up coughing because it has been long time since I send my doll to the laundry house.

I still need someone that I can hold to and to be hold. It does not have to be a man, does it? A friend will do. Just hug each other and do not have to say a word to one another. I will get better from my stress. I just know that. The problem is, I do not know to whom I can give my biggest hug to… Maybe I should get another big teddy bear to hug and to hold and probably to be punched...

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