Between your life, the driver and the music

Unless you are a driver working for somebody else’s, your car is completely the soul mate of your life. It is up to you what kind of song you want to play it in your car. The music helps your mood while driving the car. Or even better, the music helps you from boredom and avoids yourself from being sleepy.

Yesterday I went to Bandung with my friends and the driver play some nice tunes that we all can really enjoy it. He seems to be enjoying the songs as well. The radio play on some old time tunes…those songs when we were all still in high school… So, it was kinda fun and relaxing… Naturally, we can’t expect that every driver have the same taste of music just like us.

Someone that I knew even can’t drive without his heavy metal music… I can stand this one though I do wish to get out of the car immediately. Thinking about his Mom though… What would she do? Whether she prefer to take a taxi or just keep her mouth shut as long as her son willing to take her anywhere she wants to go?

The worst experience ever when years ago, me and my family were on this trip from Medan to Tarutung, which took about 5 hours drive. We rent a car along with the driver to take us there and back to Medan again. So, there we were…very early in the morning we started the long journey. Nothing really happened during that time, until the driver decided to put on some music. His music, of course. The songs all about broken hearted desperate guy in the Melayu rhythm kind of way…whatever… I struggled hard to contain my irritated feeling. But my Mom couldn’t take it any longer. She told the driver to turn off the music. And you know what, it only took him about few minutes to get drowsy and we almost hit by a truck!! With all the effort I could muster I told the driver to just play whatever music he has rather than he fall asleep and kill us all. I whisper to my Mom to be patient for another 3 hours… That was the longest 3 hours we ever have. And he even played the worst song ever. It contains a conversation between the singers, like a local jokes or something which was more annoying than before. But what could we do about it? Rather than being dead because a truck hit all of us over sleepy driver just because we were not allowing him to have his music…

Eventually, our life is more important than the irritated feeling over some music preference of the driver… *BIGGRIN*

Balance in life

Whenever I put on my clothes, I prefer to look myself in the mirror located in my Mom’s room. Why? That mirror rarely shows my real figure. I look slimmer (not saying that I look slim, that will be a total bogus and I must be on crack) and everything I wear look nice on me.

But, the mirror in my room show differently. Whatever I wear I look hideous. I look ten times bigger from my real size. In short, if I want to have low self esteem, just take a look at myself in this mirror.

So, you can imagine which one I prefer to look at… Definitely the one that can boost my self confidence…

In the reality we do the same thing. Naturally, we prefer to hear nice things that can increase our spirit and be positive about ourselves. Nobody wants to hear bad things about themselves as it will makes us sad and can only think bad about ourselves.

But we also need to realize, to hear constant praises, all the times is just as bad as getting daily insult. And why’s that?

Listening to constant praises will makes us think that there is no need for improvement. What for? We are already in the good performance. Everything that we do is good. I am looking perfect. If anyone disagrees, then they are the one who is having problem not me. Besides, I have more people who love me and I believe them more.

While listening to daily insult will definitely makes us feel …oh I am so bad. I can not do anything right. I am so useless. I am so worthless. Why I even alive in this world if there is nothing good come out of me…? Why nobody loves and appreciate me? Am I really that bad?

Will there be anything good come out of the above situation? None…

I think is good to have confidence and feel good about ourselves. But doing that excessively is not right. It will make us becoming a stuck up person who can’t take any feed back even though that can improve whatever we are doing at that moment. Being criticized all the times makes us have no confidence and we believe everything we do is worthless.

We have to know how to balance things…

Like in my case, I look at both mirrors… The other one to know which one that needs improvement… and the other one of course to boost my self confidence. That with all the flaws I may have, I am still good and most definitely not useless.

Which one is saying the truth?

Once upon a time, there are three people living side by side in one neighborhood. They are Myra, Jessica and Darren. Myra is the head of the neighborhood. One day, Myra told Jessica that Darren said something bad about her. Jessica was surprised and taken aback because all these time she has encountered zero problems with Darren. Well, they have disagreement once in a while but never really fatal.

Until about a year later, Jessica decided to ask Darren about this, and Darren said he never said anything like that.

I sometimes always wonder about this. Let us just say that Darren did say something not nice about Jessica behind her back to Myra. Did he say that because Jessica once hurt him and he feel awkward to respond directly to her? Though Myra is not close with Jessica, but surely he would not think that Myra is going to keep that as a secret? Or maybe he wants Myra to inform that to Jessica?

If Darren said the truth that he did not say things like that, then what was Myra up to by lying to Jessica about it? Did she want a confrontation between Jessica and Darren? Or maybe she knows that Jessica will hesitate to ask that to Darren? Does Myra enjoy seeing the awkward relationship between Jessica and Darren? From Jessica; thinking why on earth Darren saying like that to Myra and not just to her… And while Darren (if he did not say anything) get confuse why Jessica sort of keep her distance?

Life is complicated :D I guess along the way we will meet with the above situation. Perhaps rather than keeping it to ourselves for years, maybe it will be better if we just ask the person to clear up the matter, fast. It will do us no good to keep on wondering which one is saying the truth and which one is not.


We know this person dislike us. Whatever we do or say, they always find a way to against it. The world seems turn into hell whenever we are around them. And yet… we have this urge to know what they would say about us BEHIND OUR BACK… Or what this person says in defends for themselves from other people (including us) …without us knowing about it… We can’t drop that curiosity feeling… And we start lurking on the internet where now people do not hesitate to use their real name and start babbling about their deepest thoughts…
Aha… Now we find that person’s page on the net… And there…, they DID tell a bad (of course according to that person’s version and not according to us) story on us… Well, naturally they did not mention our name. But you know perfectly well, that it IS YOU that this person gossiping about on their personal page… And the way this person tell it to the world…, as if this person is the victim of your doing… You hate that, don’t you…?

Or what about you know you can’t eat chocolate because health problem or you wish to go on a diet… But, you can’t stop thinking about it… You can imagine it in front of your eyes… The chocolate bar melted in between cakes…, the chocolate cakes, the chocolate milk, the chocolate on ice cream, the chocolate on pancakes… And you think that by looking at picture full with picture about chocolate will drive away that urge away… You are hoping that your desire will be fulfilled by looking at those pictures… Seriously? Are you kidding? By looking at it, you only want them more than before… You can’t help doing that because you are in the middle of imagining what kind of chocolate that you wish to eat once you get your hands on it…

See? We know the things that we do not like… The things that we should avoid… And yet, it was like this mysterious calling from above…nudging us, poking us… Come on, let us have a look… You are curious don’t you? You want to know how it feel don’t you?

Aren’t we the kind of person who just loves looking for trouble? ^________^ We know is going to hurt us, but we can’t find the temptation to just look for it… And what good comes from that? Nothing…

Maybe I should stamped my head with a sign saying…I wanna look for troubles… Anyone can give it to me?

Grumpy me

I think I have turn into this one annoying grumpily person...

Why's that? Because I started to notice things that I usually never even bother before...and feel irritated by it... I mean if I have a good loving life, I should not be bothered with something so meaningless like that, right?

Like when we shake hand to other people. I always wondered why while people shake hand to each other, they did not do this eyes contact. Instead, both parties have they both eyes darting to many directions. They mouth mumbling greetings but it sounds so meaningless. I noticed that all the time lately.

Being over sensitive, I used to think that people do that only to me. They feel only to do the lip service or whatever, so they shake hands with me but they do not care at all. Their eyes quickly moved from me to another side of the world.

Is not need me a long time, to discover that most people are like that. And sometimes even teller or customer service while I was in the bank... (no names, mind you...) Darting eyes from them sort of a silent signal for me to get lose, move it, I have to deal with another customer...!

Or, they shake your hand but only small touch. As if, your hand have measles or something contagious that have no cure.

I feel, that if you do not have eyes contact while you shaking hand, or just do that little touching hand to means you are not sincere. And therefore for heaven sakes, why are you wasting my time by false shakes hands?

See how grumpy I become ? :D

Different action, same result

One day, you received a call from your close friend in the university. She has landed herself a job while you are still unable to nail one. She asked you to have lunch together with her and you agree since you have nothing to do anyway.

In her office, she was talking with someone who is later introduced to you as your friend’s manager. Suddenly your handphone is ringing and you excuse yourself to receive it. You go outside the room to take the call but it turn out is a miscalled. You headed back to the room where you leave your friend and your manager to find out that they were talking about you:
The manager : your friend already have a job?
Your friend : no, she is still looking for one… Why? You have something on your mind?
The manager : yes, I think we need someone in administration

You are happy to hear that your friend seems want to help you get a job until you heard :
Your friend : Oh, but my friend unfamiliar with Microsoft Office…

That would be called : STABBING IN THE BACK…

Another case, you received a call to have lunch together. You come; meet your friend and her manager. And another conversation takes place as the following:

The manager : So, are you now working or still looking?
You : I am still looking… Of course I will be very grateful if you have something for me in this office
The manager : Yes, I think we have something vacant for you…
Your friend : Oh, but she is unfamiliar with Microsoft Office

Awkward moment…

The manager (stiffly) : ooooh, then you should try to make yourself familiar with it… Then, you can contact me
You : … (speechless)


Different situation, different ways, but still the result is the same. You get hurt and do not think will ever going to see that kind of friend in the future…

Never Give Up

Have you ever feel hesitation when you are in the middle of the road? Like you want to visit a far away place that you have no idea about… Then in the middle of the journey you suddenly feel a slight of doubt. Should I just go back? What if I stumble along the way? What if I find many obstacles that prevent me in reaching my destination? Maybe it will be better for me to stop here and return to the place that I have known very well?

Or should I keep on going to this unknown destination? Just go with the flow… Deal with the obstacles ahead… Like perhaps get lost along the way… I may try to ask for direction though I need to process the information whether it will lead me to the destination or misleading… The journey may take a bit longer than I was expecting… I may get disappointed to find things are not as easy as I thought it would be… And yet, I am still continuing the journey…

It is the same thing when we have a dream or goal in our life. In reaching for it, we will have doubts, fear and face many challenges… We often think that it may be best for us to quit. But, if we just quit in the middle of our journey…will we able to look ourselves in the mirror in the future? Hey, I am the person who once has this dream but decided to quit… Can’t we stop think in the future, what would be happened to us if we keep on pursuing the dream? Will I have more regrets for not continuing the journey to reaching my dream or for all the times and efforts that I have spent? Of course for not knowing whatever waiting for us in the end of the road, we may feel frustrated as the road is not easy for us to go. We may wondering, did I make the right choice to go there… Is this the right path for me to reach my destination?

But after all the efforts, you finally made it to the destination… No matter what the result will be…we should not feel that we have done pointless thing. So we can’t reach it within…say a year…while others only need few months… It’s the journey to get there that matter. We will treasure it the moment when we finally reach the destination. Once we reached it, we will appreciate it knowing is hard to get there…

So, are we going to quit now while we are in the middle of the journey? Or should we continue with all strength and prayers that we have?

Reality check

A friend of mine told me a story about her room mate who dating this younger guy for about 5 years now. Nothing wrong with the age difference is just my friend and it seems the rest of the world knows that this guy does not love that woman. He is only using her to get more money or to have things that probably will be given to his real girlfriend. Many people have told her room mate to watch with that guy, but she did not want to listen. Until finally, her roommate find out about this guy having other girl friend, they have a fight and break up. All her friends were so happy and glad that she finally dumps that guy. But my friend’s roommate seems unable to forget him. So my friend and other people try to cheer her up by taking her to sightseeing or hang out at the café… They were all hoping this woman would soon get over that useless guy. After all the efforts, my friend roommate’s suddenly inform everyone that she is back with that guy. She said she is so used to him already; she can not bear a life without that guy. My friend and the others were so pissed they decided they will have nothing to do with that woman.
“Let her fall into the deepest hole…,”One of the friends said. “Maybe after that she will realize how worthless that guy really is…”

I think there are several lessons that we can take from the above story.

First, though we have been taught to believe with our capability and such, often others can spot it better than us. Like we think we can sing beautifully. Others who listened to our voice say the other way around. We may say that those people only jealous with our capability. But when 11 from 10 people said that we have a voice like a chicken squeaking …then you might try to reconsider that you have no talent in singing.
Of course when someone gives a feedback, we may ask him or her what to do to make it better… If someone really cares to give a feedback, she or he will at least have a decency to tell you what to do next or proofs from the information that they have given you… Don’t think because others do not approve you they are just automatically jealous at you.

Second, talking from my own experience as well…sometimes we have getting used to something or situation. To get out from the situation or to let go that something, is too frightening to us. We are facing with the uncertainty. So, what to do next? Can I have something new or be in a total different situation? What if I can not find it? What if that something new is not going to give me comfort? What if that situation is making me worst than I already am?
Well, though is easier said than done… at least we try, right? So, we will have no regret and definitely not wasting a precious time to something that do not makes us happy.

Third, our friend and we included, is not our own parents, an angel, or God. There is a limit to the thing called patience. If we or they have been trying so hard to open this sort of lost soul to change their wrong destination to the correct one…and that person does not listening at all…they would probably say, oh well…maybe this lost soul should feel the experience by first hand before realizing the harsh truth. It took a very big heart for a friend to stick by their lost soul’s friend until that person able to find the right way ;)

Life is a school to learn a lot of thing, isn’t it?

Let's upload!

With so many social networkings now everybody seems busy to update their status. Even uploading photo instantly at the same time... Everybody seems eager to let the whole world to know what they are up to and along with the location... The hot spot such as bombing place, or dissaster place is even better ... Oh, when I said EVERYBODY .... that is including me...

Oten we just taped something funny or hillarious and upload them into the internet.... It was like, there is nothing called privacy anymore and everything is for other people to watch and consume...

Well, I have to admit that having internet is something that really help a lot... We are getting information by the second... Whether we need it or not ... And we can follow the updated status of movie stars or famous singers even authors... Is fun...

Then of course I sort of thing... what if I fall on the street after stomping a garbage and someone recorded that ...then posted on the internet... Naturally when I fall on the street, I do not thinks is funny... In fact is probably hurt... Then it will be even disaster if one of my nephews or nieces called me up and said,"Aunty, I saw you falling down on the street over a banana..." Yikes... That will be a double humiliating. The first time already give enough pain...then again on the net being watched by people who knows me and who have no idea about me...

In the old days, when people submitted about something funny on others, wondering if the people on the video know about it... And whether the person is already wiser enough to just laugh along with everybody else about the ridiculous thing that went on the video

Wondering if I can be wiser enough to see me on the net doing something stupid and got taped by someone.... And just to let that go despite the desire to break that someone's neck because filming me without my consent and have a great laugh on my pain...

Cheap versus expensive

Money buys quality. People often said that to me. But others not automatically agree with it. For me, I think I am in betweens.

I have to admit, that buying expensive things is not recommended. Not to mention if you have limited budget. Buying a branded blouse will rock your world into the gutter because you have no money left. Kidding…

But for several of my things, I prefer to find something that is a bit expensive but can be wearing up to two years or more. Though when I paid for that expensive things, it felt like I was slapped hundreds of time on my face…
Want some examples?

Shoes to go to work
Though my work did not require me to stand too long, but I still need shoes that can make my feet feel comfortable. And sorry to say, I need to buy branded show to have that comfortable feeling. Since the shoes lasting until about three years… I do not mind at all… But still have that hurt feeling when I paid the shoes… Grinning…

I have to wear glasses to be able to see… No… Not exaggerating … but the truth. Since I am still scare on trying wear soft lenses (such a tacky person)… glasses is the only option for me. Once, my colleague told me to get a cheap one. With the frame and the glasses only cost me 300,000 Rupiahs! Wow… I was amazed. But my amazement only lasted 3 months. After that, the frame was totally damaged and even given me pimples. So, I bought another one which a lot more expensive. And I have been wearing it for more than 2,5 years now. Well, this argument probably works because my sights are stable within that period so I do not need to go back and forth checking my eyes. And I hate going to the optic and choosing which glasses suited with my face.

I have a friend who is very fashionable. I asked her, whether she prefer cheap clothing or branded expensive items. She said, she does not mind with cheap clothing. HOWEVER, she said cheap clothing is easily damaged. While she likes wearing it for many times, if she really likes the clothes. Once she bought this cute blouse for only 50,000 Rupiahs. After three times seeing her with that clothes, I asked her why she did not wear it again. She said the dress was torn beyond recognition. The fabric is too thin and easily damaged. After that she did not want to buy cheap clothing again.

Cheap clothing is perfect for people who want to look fashionable and easily bored. Perhaps wearing it for 2 – 3 times, and they just tossed it …. If the dress not previously damaged. While others prefer to wear it for many occasions. And keep it… Who knows that in the future this kind of clothing will be trendy again…

So, either is cheap or expensive… it depends on our needs. No need to push it if you can’t afford it. But if you think you are going to use it for a long time, then try to save a little bit

Morning on the beach

Morning on the beach
Originally uploaded by evangelalex
Taken at Anyer beach near The Banten Cottage


There was a time when I have to go home under the heavy rain… It was like all torments combined in this world to describe what I have to put up with… Okay, I am a bit exaggerating… But can you imagine, I have to walk against the wind that blowing hard on my face, the dripping water run through my body (the umbrella was totally useless at the time like this)…. And I have to walk through the flood as the result from the heavy rain… The only thing left dried from the heavy rain was my head, protected by my umbrella. The rest of me was a mess. I looked like a rat crawling out from the gutter…

Then I arrive in the area around my home to find that there was no trace of heavy rain at all. I was stunned to see the street was totally dry.

I could feel people start looking at me with bewilderment feeling I suppose. They probably wonder, what the heck happened to me…

When we saw something different out of the ordinary we instantly let our imagination to go wild try to figure that out…
In my case, people might think that I did walk under the rain because I was not bringing an umbrella. Or someone crazy enough to push me into the swimming pool… Or maybe I pour myself a bucket of cold water just for fun…
But naturally, nobody even bother to ask me what the real reason for being totally wet…

Then again, why should they ask me? They do not know me. And we would probably never go to see each other anymore in the future. Why being such a nosy person poking someone else’s business?
Then again, why can’t we just ask if we see something odd with people around us? We may meet someone fidgeting on the street… or perhaps crying … We probably will only look at that person, wondering by ourselves what was going on… then the next minute we just look to the other way… Because we do not want to know and get involved once we receive the information…

Maybe, we could start practicing together how to take notice of something that not right and willing to do something about it… I need that practice too… It will takes times… but hopefully I can get it right someday…

Learning ...

When Korean TV drama first hit Indonesia, me and my parents were among those who glued on our local tv station to follow the series. Finally, unable to bear our eagerness to find out the ending, my Dad decided to buy the VCD player (yes, it was still the age of VCD player instead of DVD’s) …

However, none of them want to try to learn to play the VCD player by themselves. I remembered that it was weekend, so I was at home all day starting from Saturday up to Sunday. I was like this movie operator for them. Movie in VCD is not like in DVD. One disc of DVD is able to contain up to 7 movies. While a disc in VCD only able to contain for an episode or one movie only. So, basically my job’s description is to be prepared in stand-by mode whenever an episode is finish then hurry up continue with another…

When I protested this kind of arrangement, my parents simply said that:
I am old, is hard for me to read the manual
I am old, is hard for me to figure out which button to push
I am old, I can’t remember what you have thought me to
What’s the point of having a kid at home when you can’t tell them what to do? (huh?)

What more can I say?? Is not like that I am going anywhere that weekend…

But eventually, Monday is coming and I have to be in the office again… After spending hours that seems like forever, I hurried to go home in order to be able to watch the next chapter of the Korean drama series … You can imagine my disappointment when I found out that my parents have watched the series to the last episode and do not bother to wait for me.

Wait… They watched the series by themselves? Who helped them with the VCD player?

“Oh, we did it by ourselves,” my Mom answered with her glowing face.

What? Then what about all the crap about being old and can’t read the manual and such?

“Well, you are here yesterday… So, why should we bother to do it by ourselves?” this time my Dad answered my question. “Don’t be ridiculous…”

I see.

Lessons from the above story:

If you have someone else to be bossy around, then why bother to do it yourself?

If you really want to do it, then there is nothing that can stop you…

The decision

I met a friend few days ago. She complained that she does not know to where this life is going to lead here. She said she did not understand herself for being reluctant to marry her long time bf. They have been together for about 7 years. He is a nice guy. Very mature (he should be in this kind of age, right?). I did not ask her about whether the guy has financial stabiliy or not. It would be too pry for details. But, overall, he is a nice guy according to her. Now she is wondering whether because they have been going out for far too long, the so-called-spark between them have died out. And therefore, she could not decide whether she should marry him or not.

"Am I make the wrong decision here?" she asked me. "I was worried that those romantic movies consumed my mind, so I want everything so lovely if I do get married. I do not want to end up like my friend, marrying her long time bf, just for a month and then get divorce because they got bored to each other..."

And then she said,"I have been acting like teens. I like looking this guy in the office because he is so cute. And my heart leap everytime I saw him. Or drooling over to hot actors on TV. Am I being childish? Is there something wrong with me?"

I can not help her with this, so I just listened and sometimes give a bit of comments. I said to her, that she has to make sure, what she really wants by getting married. Some people get married just for something to rely on in the old days. Others do get married because they love each other. But most people I know getting married just to fulfill the circle of life. I am reaching certain age and therefore need to get married and have children also a must. I don't know which category she fits in... and that is including myself as well. In the end, whatever I told her, she is the one who going to make the decision.

Apartment or house?

Renting a House or Apartment - The only guide you will ever need!

A friend of mine once asking. Would you prefer to live (this of course under the condition that money is not a big issue) in the apartment or ia common house, which is on the ground with backyard and noisy neighbours and stuffs like that…

Funny to think, that I must be included to the list of person who never bothered about other people. Never care about people around me, except my friends … of course…
So, the perfect place for me to live in, should be in an apartment. Right? But, noo...honestly.. I am not interested to live permanently at an apartment.

First, I don’t like staying in a very high place for more than a week. I don’t know why, but it’s like going to the office and not going home forever. You met people when you are inside the lift, but you won’t bother to get to know them.

Second, I feel like I was trapped inside a big box, and could not breath properly. Okay, this is over reacting. But that is the way I feel about staying in the apartment.

Third, there are so many rules to be followed. Can not cook with ingredients that will bother your neighbour, can not have your own pet,and blah, blah

Fourth, imagine you having a small child and then one day they walk out to the terrace and just flown to the ground because they think they are superman…

Excuses, probably because I do not have enough money to live in the apartment. Additionally, I am still a very conservative person … in so many ways. I prefer to live in a house, no matter how small it is… But, it stayed on the ground, have a backyard or maybe a garage to park my car (if I could afford to buy it someday) and probably pretend to say hi to my-want-to-know-neighbour, no matter how annoying they are will be to me…

Do I talk any sense here or just babbling???

Things on wedding party

When I was much, much younger, I love going to a wedding party. Seeing the bride glowing in her white dress, the groom look nervous, the parents look anxious…, the bridesmaid look annoyed with their dresses… And we the children get to wear fancy dress and just do whatever we want….

Then I grow up, and I hate attending wedding’s party. Well, except my friend’s wedding party of course. I just hate that I have to prepare the dress, what to wear, what to wear with, oh which bag I have to use… Why my hair is a mess …. In short, the preparation could take hours while I will only be there for minutes… 1 hour is the maximum time.

My consolation is hunting food and ice cream at the party. Or at least have a chit chat time with my friends. Looking at guys or people who pretend they do not know that there is a long line of people queuing to have their meals… People who takes too much of food just to toss it on an empty table…. While guests who come late will find out that they have nothing to eat…

One embarrassing moment I remembered was when I attending a wedding party with my Dad. It was his colleague’s wedding party so he has to go. The party being held in an area that we have no idea where it is… After driving for a few hours, finally we arrived there. There is a big building and it seems there were two different wedding parties. I asked my Dad what are the name of the couple. He remembered his colleague’s name obviously. And I look at the announcement in front of one side of the building. Hmmm, it seems we were in the right place. So, as usual we sign off the guest book, put an envelope containing the wedding gift to the box preparing for that. And then we started to approach the couple. Within meters, my Dad suddenly realized we entered the wrong party. The most annoying part, my Dad calmly told me to get the envelope back while he headed to the next building. Hiding my frustration, I asked nicely to the people guarding the box that I need the envelope back as we have entered a wrong party. It turn out, both grooms have a same name. Luckily for me, the envelope was sort of stuck and we could get it out easily. But the envelope was badly torn and to replace that I have to go to the nearest mini market. Since that on, we read the couple’s name carefully on the invitation before we go to any wedding party.

Anybody want to share some experiences? :D

credit card

I have a friend who advice me not to buy things impulsively with credit card…

But how can I resist the offer of buy 1 get 2 or pay for 2 you get 3… Or get additional discount up to 50% for dine in together. Can’t imagine if there is any discount on items such as books, clothes, shoes... Not to mention the installment offer… That will be a total temptation…

In reality, we need to read the rules and terms very carefully. Like for example, the discount will only apply to meals not with the beverages. Or, you have to buy up to certain amount before you entitle to receive the discount.

I thought my friend gave me a very good advice… Up to the time I found out that she take a one day leave to go to Gramedia book store to enjoy last day discount on books!!

Well, everyone has their own weak spot…, right?

I think, is okay for us to have at least one credit card. Sometimes you do need it for emergency purpose. Noooo, not for buying as many as you can on one day discount fashion items… But, emergency situation like any member of your family have to be treated in the hospital. Let us just say that we do not have insurance to cover it. As you know, the hospital always asks for down payment. This is when your credit card can really save you, at least for a while. Well, in the end we have to pay it…

Credit card can be useful, as long as we know how to use it correctly…

So, close those magazines and newspaper and keep away from the discount programs ads!!

in wait we learn

If you heard the word “WAITING”, what is the first that cross your mind?
1. Oh my God, I have to spend another useless hours … what should I do now?!
2. What will be the result? Can I know it now?
3. How come they do this to me? Why can’t they see me on time? Don’t they appreciate me?
4. Why can’t I have it now? I want it now!
5. Fine… I will use this moment to finish reading this book … or I don’t know… I will find something useful to do
6. Great, I can chat and browse and be totally alone with my Blackberry and have no interruption

Well, I guess most of us hate waiting… Either that waiting for someone who has made an appointment with us or waiting for a doctor who seems have other important engagement. Waiting makes us in agony process as we have no idea about the result from waiting… Will that someone finally come? If not, then what happened to that someone? Is that someone has an accident? Or worse, they just simply forget about the appointment? And where is this doctor? Does he have other assignment? If yes, can we find out about it now rather than waiting in despair whether the doctor is going to show up or otherwise?

But sometimes in life, to have something that we really want then we have to go through the waiting process. A writer can’t just become famous in a day. This person probably has to go through so many rejections before finally able to publish the book. And the book will not be automatically accepted by the reader… It might take longer times. It can be years. If the writer is not patient enough to endure the waiting process, I suppose he or she will fall into a disappointment.
Or another person have to wait for years before people finally aware that his or her creation (it could be the cooking or fashion attires) and adore it. A scientist have to wait for years before finding out that his or her finding can help a lot of people…

We (that including me) often find the waiting process is the most torturing thing to do. In the dark we have to wait in despair whether we do the right thing or otherwise. The not knowing moment is unbearable. Some of us prefer the instant way or short cut. It is hard for us to realize that the waiting process is to teach us about so many things. That we should appreciate things when we finally have them and that is our choice to have it with that way.

I can only hope that this time I will be able to endure the waiting process… Enough for me to learn that there is no such things called useless and how to appreciate what we have.

Face off with the stingy

A friend of mine once tells me a story about this stingy person in her office. At first she did not notice how stingy this person was… Until the following things that she finally aware of:
1. Tissue
Being single and live alone, my friend always makes sure that all her expenses were controlled. So, she predicted that in a month she would be spending a certain amount of money to buy few packs of tissue to be used in the office. Since she has been doing this for several years, obviously she finally noticed that her tissue ran out faster than usual because of this stingy person. This person keeps on coming to her desk taking her tissue every now and then…
And the Stingy even dare to ask her,”Hey, where is your tissue? I need it!”

2. Luncheon
Once in a while, my friend likes to go out to have lunch. She can not say no when the Stingy wants to go out with her.
The problem is, whenever they arrive in the restaurant the Stingy would said that she forgot her pursue. Eventually my friend has to cover for the meal. And later, when my friend asked the Stingy to return the money, she would say she forgot to bring the money or she would do it later…. And finally my friend gave up

3. Snacks
I noticed how thin my friend was because it turn out she has decided not to prepare a stock of snacks in her drawer. She was not the one who finished the snacks but her stingy colleague successfully wipes out her stocks… Tragic… She finally getting slim not only physically but also her wallet…

She has been telling me that story for months and I simply listen… Because once I was facing a person sort of like her colleague. This person keep on screaming at me and the others to give a treat in a fancy restaurant. Which is why I keep avoiding to meet this person due to that reason. I was unable to say rudely that I do not like to be asked like that all the times. So, eventually I told my friend to do the same. Considering that it is her colleague and she will seeing her everyday… But, she could try a drastic tactic if she really can not stand it anymore… She agreed… Few weeks later, she gave me the report.

As usual, they went out together to lunch outside the office. They entered the restaurant and before they order meals, my friend asked: “Hey, you bring cash, right? I only have limited amount, only to pay my own meals and transportation back to the office”

The stingy flabbergasted and said,”What? Why in the heck you only bring limited amount of money? I do not bring any…”

My friend calmly said,”I saw the ATM over there… I can wait for you to take it while we ordering something to eat…”

The (not so surprise) replied from Stingy was,”But I did not bring my ATM… What should we do? We have ordered the meal…”

Standing up my friend called the waiter and apology first before cancelling the order. They went out and the stingy grumbled,”You humiliated us! How can we ever going back to this restaurant?”

My friend said…that was the starving moment ever…but also the most satisfying moment in her life…

Sometimes, we just need to stand up for ourselves… Being nice, does not mean you are allowing other people walk all over you…

Question that not need to be asked (if you do not wish to hear sincere answer)

Am I fat?
Well, you asked the question…it means you sort of realize that you are overweight. Do you really need to torture your friend by asking that? And if you ask that question, are you doing that to seek ways in reducing your weight or simply wants a comfort answer… Imagine your friends staring at you fidgeting to try simplify the right answer… If that is your motive in questioning your friends, perhaps you should ask mirror on the wall…

Am I ugly?
Ooouchh… Why in the heck do you ask that kind of question? AM I UGLY? Are you serious? You really want to know? Really?
If you already think yourself ugly, then why bother to ask people around the town to confirm it? Do you need another confirmation to low your self esteem? And if they are really your friends, do you think they are going to answer that? Don’t involve other people to your misery…
Your true friends will say the other way around because they see what’s in you instead of your physical appearance… That is, if you really as ugly as you think

Am I stupid?
Gosh, what kind of question is that? So, you asked other people and then they answer cruelly but truly…YES YOU ARE! You can’t even finish this simple task…or you can’t even understand this simple plan… If that is the answer, then what will you do? You are going to break down and cry and drowning yourself even more?
I guess if you failed in something that does not necessarily label you stupid… Find out what is wrong and get on with the solution. Rather than wasting your time asking thing that should not have been asked.

Let's eat!

If you wish to give your friend a treat in a restaurant, what is the thing that drive you make that decision?

Well…first, you probably have something to be celebrated. Like a birthday, a farewell, a promotion… or whatever… And you wish to celebrate it with your friends or people around you…

After deciding which person that you wish to invite, the next thing on your mind is where you are going to give a treat… Will it be in a Indonesian restaurant, or Chinese restaurant, or Japanese, Indian, or just take them to fast food outlet? Why you should bother to think about the place? Well, that is because some of your friends might be a vegetarian or allergic to sea food. You want everybody have a great time so you wish to make sure that everybody can enjoy the meal.

What about if you are the one who got invited? Maybe your friend is having a birthday, or your colleague celebrate his or her promotion or someone in your office leaving to another company and take you and other colleagues to dine out. Will you be asking your friend or your colleague to make sure that they pick the place where you can eat the meal? Certainly not, right? That would be totally rude and crazy. The person who invites you must already aware that several of the invitee unable to eat certain meat…

So, I can understand the excuse of not wanting to go because you can’t eat the meal due to medical reason or because you are allergic… But I always surprise when people told me that the reason they do not want to go because they do not know about the food and they are certain will not like it at all… So, they choose not to go…

Now, before I continue… I am sure you all read that my main hobby is eating, right? So, naturally I feel like…WHAT??? What kind of excuse is that? You refuse to go just because you are not familiar with the food? You are certain not to like the food that you have no idea whatsoever…

I always think is a great opportunity to dine in a place that I have no idea about…on the occasion that I was being treated by someone! I can find out whether the meal is good or not… and if not, then I have nothing to loose… Besides, being invited means that the person wants me to have fun…so, it would be crazy to refuse the kind offer … Am I right?

So, if you and your friends being treated in a new restaurant and turn out that the meals is totally disaster…try to keep it to yourself… Don’t say it to your friend,”Thanks for bringing me here… But the food is terrible… So, next time…don’t take me here again…”

I can assure you, you will not be invited… ever again…, in anywhere or in any occasion.

Just enjoy the experience… and try to open your eyes, heart and of course…your tongue to something new…

Let’s EAT!!!!


Have you ever asked your overweight friends what is their main hobby? Well, most of my overweight friends (including myself) claim that eating as our main hobby. And we are still wondering why we have problems with weight… LOL

In some countries, being overweight is considered as a status. I mean, this person must have more than enough money to buy themselves overloaded meals to increase their weight. So, obviously they must be rich people…

Nowadays, when a person able to gain access on knowledge about healthy living, being overweight is not good and definitely is not healthy.
Being overweight could result in having a heart problem, obese, diabetic, and many other diseases. People then, in order to maintain their health must reduce several foods in their life.

For me, I will not mind to reduce any kind of food like sea food, noodles, fried bananas or any other fried meals, any kind of meats (remember, I am a truly carnivore) … But, if I was told to never again eat CHOCOLATE or ICE CREAM… I think I will drop dead on the spot…

I do not know why…, from all my favorite food…I am a die hard fan of chocolate. I love any kind of chocolates…
I love dark chocolate
I like chocolate with almond
I like chocolate with hazelnut
I like chocolate on cakes
I like chocolate on ice cream

I hardly ever keep stock of chocolates in the refrigerator because I always feel challenged to finish them all within few minutes. LOL… Chocolate is the only thing in this world that I do not wish to share with others… Sort of like a lover, hahahaha…. Kidding…

Well, from what I read in , eating chocolate have benefits such as lower the possibility of a heart attack. However, too much eating chocolate can increasing risk of obesity. I suppose do or have things too much are not good, eh?

And if you wondering why Valentine’s day always related with chocolate, that’s because romantic old stories identifies it as an aphrodisiac. No scientific proofs, though…but is not like we are going to care about that…

So, why I do like chocolate so much?

To be honest, I have no idea… I like the combination between bitter and sweet while eating the chocolate… I love the sensation how the chocolate melted on the tongue…then down to the throat… It feels good… It also helps me to lit up my mood whenever I have PMS… Is it because the chocolate containing the sugar? Maybe anybody have any idea?

money, money and money

We often heard that money can buy almost everything…
Naturally it can not be used to bribe The Angel of Death when the angel comes to take your life …
But yes, unfortunately it can buy almost about everything…

Money also can be used to test someone’s personality…

If someone you knew from ages ago never contacted you all these times…suddenly come up in front of your door…and ask for a loan? What is the first thing that crosses your mind?
Whether this person really in need for some quick cash… or just another person who have no shame at all…

If someone that you know really well ask for a loan of a huge amount of money, promise you that it will be returned in a certain period of time… But then, this person not only fails to return the money but always avoid you whenever you ask for the money…what will you think of the person? Will you think you can trust him or her again in the future?

If someone you know for a long time, said that he or she is in the middle of opening a new business and ask you whether you would like to help them by becoming an investor…you would do it, right? But then, when it comes the time to return the investment to you, she or he seems unable to give it to you… Worst, they give you excuses and not able to return the money… What will comes on your mind regarding this person?

How sad that a long time friendship can be destroyed by the thing so called money…

Love is in the air...

A few years ago, my Mom’s friend came by to our house to deliver a wedding invitation.

I feel a bit sad for my Mom every times someone gave her a wedding invitation because she would be thinking…oh, no… Why my daughter still single, blah, blah, blah…

Anyway, these two mothers then busy talking about the wedding party… The details of the party, the location… After her friend went home, my Mom asked me to go with her to the party. I was a bit hesitating about it… because …I hate going to the wedding party.

Then she said something like this,” My friend said she dislike her future daughter in-laws… If only his son married to you…”

I curious and asked,”Why is that?”

My Mother replied,”She said her daughter in law is not pretty, not to mention that she is much shorter and darker…”

My first reaction was, why her friend talked like that? I mean, if she did not approve then why went along with the party anyway?

But the next thing that came out from my Mom’s was intrigued me to come to the party. She said that her friend’s son is so handsome and tall… That intrigued to see for myself how drop dead handsome the guy is compare to the so-called ugly future wife.

And finally the wedding day arrive, we all went there together… I looked around to see the happy couple.

First, I saw the wife. Okay…, so she is not pretty… But she was glowing in her wedding dress. She looked happy and smiled a lot. And yes, she is short. I am short… but she was shorter than me. After that, I looked for the supposedly dazzling handsome husband…

He looked…far below my expectation. Don’t get me wrong…

When my Mom said that the guy is handsome, I compare him with my Dad… Hey, I am not kidding… My Dad is totally handsome guy… Sooo, naturally I comparing this guy that I have never known with my Dad … And to this comparison, the guy is totally defeated. In looks, I mean…

But the thing that get me thinking is:
I was wondering that… I know that every parents think that their children is the best diamond in the world… But to listen a mother talking bad about her future daughter in law…sighed… Did they ever think that every parents will think the same way and talking behind their back as well?

And while both parents despise one another, their children locked eyes and decided to walk together in this life as one instead of two… Only times will tell, whether they able to go through thick walls and challenges along with happiness and love…

Despite the other being so tall and the other is so short…

Junks and junks

I have been cleaning up my room for these couple of days…and it was like OH MY GOD moment…

Not a surprise actually, but it turn out I loves collecting junks!

I almost can’t believe it the huge piles of junks I have in my room… No wonder it felt so tight inside the room…

I keep almost about everything. The things that I considered important (but it seems I have no time whatsoever to read it through), stuffs that I think is memorable…(movie tickets, stamps, coins, whatever…), copies of several documents, copies of bills…and lots more…

Once I read that many people who overly keep things inside their house is called a compulsive hoarder (you may check
They keep things like newspapers, books, little items that they considered important up to the point where the stuffs they keep take over their life. Really takes their life as sometimes the stuffs that they hold on for so long crushed from the piles and hit them. Their bodies will be found by others stuck under the piles of junks (but treasures for them)

I surely hope I am not going to turn into like that… I mean, I do keep newspapers, magazines for years… because I remember there is something important on them but have no time to read them (or at least I pretend to be busy)…

So far I have compiled 5 plastic bags (relax! They are all in small form) of those junks containing things that I do not need it… I am too excited to clean up my rooms from those junks I almost destroy photos that I kept inside a piles of papers…!!! This cleaning process I am afraid will take another days before I finally able to make my room really fresh…or at least have more space than before…

Wish me luck :=)

Watching old people

Learning from the old people :

When we were a lot younger, seeing old people it was like seeing another form coming from far away planets in the universe. They do not understand what the heck we are talking about. They disapproved with everything that we decide. They dislike our taste on fashion. They hate our preference in music. In short, we have nothing in common.

Finally, I learn a bit more about old people, when my own parents slowly reaching to the age of being ancient...or scary old.

I find out that they (well, again...these findings does not apply to all!) :

1. Feel offended when we suggested them to use a walking staff or wheelchair...
Their comment will be : What, I am that slow to you? (you think???)

2. Forgetful
One time they say another 5 minutes they will say something different... And afterwards we will have huge arguments about what previously have been said versus the new version...

3. In-decisive
Unable to make up their mind, especially for something that still long far ahead in the future

4. Memory set back to the past
They can remember exactly what happened in the past as a contradiction from being forgetful on current matters...

Additionally, they are (again, like I always says from time to times, being old does not automatically means they are any wiser):
1. Manner...
Try to pass your elders without greets them... They will offended...and will give you long lecture about how we should have manner etc, etc, etc
I kinda like it... Because I am not easy to chat with new people, greeting is my way to open a conversation with strangers...

2. Punctual
If they are not forgetful, they are very punctual and do not like to keep other people waiting or waiting for others...
The bad news from this, since they are a bit slow now...they prefer to go much earlier .... Like for example, if the plane leaving around 11 AM, they will insist to depart from the house at 7 AM!!! it's not like the airport located in some far away island or something!

3. Discipline
Being punctual actually is one ways of them being discipline. They sort of stick to the rule and therefore surprise when other people do not do the same thing!

4. Committed
When they said they want to do something, they usually do it and fully committed

5. A bit of a neat freak...
Though their sight not as good as the younger days, they can always spot a tiny dust lying on the table from meters away

Anybody wants to add something?? Considering this is the fact that we are headed in a few years to come .... HEHEHEH